happy daylight savings time

As you can see from the new header, as of tomorrow, I will be ensconced in baby world. I will be keeping things as up-to-date as possible. If you're uncomfortable with baby talk, I urge you to stay away for the next 10 days. Sure, I haven't packed yet, I have yet to gather all the puppies' belongings to bring to the ex's (they require a lot of paraphernalia), I apparently need to go to Verizon (you SUCK) and replace the lemon phone they just replaced 2 weeks ago because when I plug it in, i get a lovely "Unable to charge" message, and I'm not quite sure how I'm getting to the airport. Good thing I get that extra hour of sleep tonight...oops spring FORWARD, fall BACK. Dammit, there's never enough hours in the day.

As if having a brand new grandbaby less than a mile away wasn't enough, my mother has apparently seen it as her new mission to find me a husband. She has suggested that I might want to go out to dinner with some random guy when I'm down there. Here's my thought on the mother date fix-up (which she swears is not a fix up): My mother has been single now for close to 30 years. The men she has dated over that time have been flawed in the most annoying and obnoxious ways possible. This is the woman I'm going to allow to make choices regarding my love life? I'll pass. I'd discourage her by sending her a picture of CNG, but I don't have one, and if I did, it would just give her something to grill me about every chance she gets.


Jeff said...

As you know, I've embarked upon a fantastic journey into the podcasting word. As my A Life of Play podcast is all about fun things to do in your free time (not yours specifically), I should probably get you on the phone and do an interview about enjoying time with nieces, nephews and other small animals.

Have a great trip. I hope CNG doesn't change teams while you're away and become CAG.

Jeff said...

Oh, yeah. As tempted as I am to put a link to the podcast here, I won't.

But what I will do is suggest that you go out with some of the fine men your mum talks to you about. What could be so horrible?

Is it bad if the guy still lives in the basement of his parents house and his work wear consists of a paper hat and a headset connected to a drive-through box?

Is it so crazy that these prospective mates list Schlitz and NASCAR as their two passions on their dating profile. Which, by the way, is posted on mat.com (the word match was two letters too hard to spell so they shortened it for redneck country).

And finally, what's so wrong about a guy who's a CB afficienado? He's got lots of friends - even if they are all on channel 19.

elizabeth said...

too funny, jeff..but here's the even worst part about the mom hook-up. the nascar and schlitz things could be true, being the southland..but he would most definitely have to be rich. you see, he could be a total asshole, but that matters less to her than the money thing. here is an exact quote of something she said to my ex a couple of years ago, when she decided we should have been getting married:

"If you don't step up and do the right thing, she's going to find someone far richer and better looking than you, and he will sweep her off her feet"

umm thanks mom, for thinking i'm shallow. oh wait, that's you. it didn't even occur to her that i might be the one not willing to commit. thank god my father is sane

sitboaf said...

Marriage, schmarriage. Just have babies.
I will miss you when you're gone, while simultaneously being envious of your time with your family.
When you return, I'll be standing underneath your window in a trenchcoat holding a boombox above my head, playing Peter Gabriel, and then you'll know. You'll just KNOW.
Also, bring me back something shiny.