AHA! Said the Roommate

The whole truth rears its ugly head. I have written about how ideal the roomie situation is, and make no mistake, I have been waiting for this "aha" moment. I have a fair bit of cynicism in me, in case you haven't noticed, so it's not a huge shock to find there there is a potential threat to the homelife happiness with the new roomie. It turns out that this (fully grown up, non-frat boy) man sometimes decides to drink to the point of personality disorder. This is not just my own personal observation, but one that is well-known amongst friends who have known him for many years. There is, in fact, a name for his alter ego. On Saturday, I met "Roy", the drunken, belligerent version of my sweet, well-mannered roommate. It was an unpleasant meeting.

We went out for some cocktails, closed the bar, and at 3ish am, headed back home, with 2 of his friends tagging along. Did I invite them back? No. I was, however, ok with it because if I got tired, I'd just excuse myself and head to bed. Or so I thought. When we got home, he disappeared into his room with one friend, leaving me to entertain the other. For over an hour. It was almost 5am at this point, and though the friend was nice and we had good conversation, it was just time to sleep, and I felt obligated to stay up because this guy was there. Finally, the roomie reappears, more drunk than when we first came home. I had every intention of saying my goodbyes and making my exit, when "Roy" showed up, rehashing some nonsense event earlier in the evening and getting unreasonably upset about it. His friend walked over, put his hands on his shoulders (the way one would do with a child mid-tantrum), and tried to calm him down. This just makes Roy more angry, and he starts to yell. Ok, enough. I told him to take his drunk ass to bed, it's 5am, we have neighbors who don't want to hear him yell any more than the rest of us do. He finally skulked off to pass out. I quickly rid myself of the pair of friends and went to sleep myself.

I fully expected an apology the next day, but instead, the roomie quickly and silently left the house without making eye contact. I figured he was just embarrassed about the situation. Fine, he should be, we'll talk later. BUT, he came home late last night, and there he was again...Roy, again with one friend from the night before. This time, he was more sensitive and whiny than belligerent and screaming, but Roy nonetheless. He tried to explain his behavior the night before, because he was upset that I "just started yelling at him", and I told him that we could discuss it when he was sober. I had to say this at least 4 times, because he was insistent on telling me how his feelings were hurt by my unprovoked attacks. He finally gave up, slammed his door and played his music at a ridiculous volume, with his friend rocking along. I knocked and peeked in once, to ask him to please turn it down, because we have neighbors who have to work in the morning. He turned it down for 3 seconds, then it shot right back up, the two of them scream-singing along. 10 minutes later, the doorbell rang, and sure enough, it was a neighbor asking if we could "at least turn the bass down". I apologized profusely for my roommate, and threw open his door. I was forced to play "Bad Mommy" to this fully grown man, again, acting like an insolent teenager.

We had a chat today about it. He was very apologetic, and I just explained that drinking was not an activity I'd be enjoying with him. I also told him that there was no grudge, but that I wasn't about to let it become a regular activity. Roy simply is not welcome in my home. We shall see what happens...

4 comments:

Kel said...

hopefully this will smooth over quickly - it sounds like he is embarassed

Jeff said...

At least your boy ROY is only a drunk. Last year, when my brother was living with me, we has BOB. You know, from What About Bob?

Well, BOB is a great, funny and fun guy most of the time...but he won't ever leave. BOB spent more nights sleeping on my double recliner than I did sitting in it. In fact, one day BOB came over with his pajamas on UNDER his jeans because he was getting tired of sleeping in his clothes.

Perhaps ROY and BOB should be roommates.

K said...

I had a roommate who seemed like a perfect gentleman until I didcovered he was a former alcoholic. I discovered this when he fell off the wagon and was nearly dead from drinking about 12 bottles of some very expensive wine that was given to me by my very beloved boyfriend at the time. I suggest you not renew his lease because Roy will return. If he doesn't have a lease kick him out now before it's winter and you feel bad for pushing him out into the cold.

Matthew said...

What was he listening to... the Ramones? Or some crap like Built To Spill or Creed. I hope it was the Ramones. Or better yet, Oingo Boingo. Danny Elfman is pretty cool, I think. Also it would help to know what he got drunk on. Mojitos? Beer? Scotch? Then I could help you figure out if you are to blame for this situation.