Thanks and Sorry IV

People have been especially curious, so this installment of thanks and sorry either

a. shows how diverse this blog is, by showing the many ways and types of people who might find me.

b. displays that this blog is much like the junk drawer of my brain, wherein you open it up and all sorts of random shit comes flying out.

Either way, however you found yourself here, welcome, and now please allow me to respond to your queries.

everything tastes rancid
: I'm so sorry to hear that, because if everything tastes rancid, surely you are either a terrible cook, or you have run out of unspoiled food to prepare, or perhaps you have a disorder of some kind that makes even delicious things taste rancid. That is an affliction that would really piss me off.

turkish female grooming habits: hmmm thanks for being interested in grooming, because I think that's a good thing. Sorry that I'm not Turkish, so I can't really help with the details of that. I have been to Turkey, though. Istanbul is really lovely, and the women (who were very sweet and also cosmopolitan and not at all covered in burqas, by the way) seem completely well-groomed to me. I did not, however, encounter a situation where asking about their specific personal grooming habits would have seemed appropriate. Maybe if I am lucky enough to return there one day.

ask lilbit: yes, you may ask me pretty much anything. I have been told that I give really good advice, and know a lot of otherwise useless information. Feel free to ask away, thanks.

disgusting facts about swiss cheese: I'm sure there are many. The most important disgusting fact about swiss cheese is that is smells like dirty feet. The holes are made by some sort of mold, I believe, which is also gross. But the feet smell? That's the worst. Thanks for asking.

love slave valentine: I did offer that I was accepting applications for a love slave as my anti-valentine. Sorry, that offer has expired.

drag ball hair show moving parts: This confused me a little bit, but it sort of sounds like you're looking for pictures of something that was recently described to me as an event that actually happens. In real life. Hair Wars! And though it seems you were looking for the drag queen version (which would rule, no doubt), it did remind me that I wanted to perform a little search of my own. So thanks! for reminding me. Here is what I learned:

People can do some crazy shit with hair:

Seriously crazy:

What about the moving parts, you ask? Behold the helicopter hair!

Where on earth would people do such a thing? It all started in Detroit. I'm a little scared of the D.

are the late 20s too late for entering law school?: Aha, something I have experience with. Not because I ever went to law school, but because I went out with a guy a few times, who is still in law school at 30ish. No, of course it's not too late to do whatever it is you want to do. If, however, you are putting off real life by hiding out in school for another few years, women will think you're a little bit lame. Sorry, I'm just saying.

I dont want to be so self absorbed: I blog, therefore, I absorb in self. Sorry, can't help you.


domesticzen said...

these posts just crack me up! I never get the fun stuff with the permissions on idle ramblings -

yep, it's me - or at least one of the voices - I believe they should all have their own blog ;)

Huge Junk said...

I once did my hair so it looked like a watermelon.

Black people were tackling me all day long trying to rip my watermelon hair off my head.

I have since retired the Watermelon hairdo.

elizabeth said...

dz: multipersonality blogging would rock. you should do it.

*disclaimer: the opinions and views of commenters here do not necessarily reflect the views of the blogger.

with that said,

hj: you are a sick, sick man.