Welcome to August

Sorry, guys. Flowers and girliness have returned to LBM. The dominatrix theme was cute for a few weeks, and especially sweet because I was assisted by my man. What can I say? He's a bit of a perv. I dig that about him.

Who's sick of hearing about my man by now? Sucks for you. I was initially worried about writing about him, as you may remember, when we first started dating. After all, he was very much aware of this site, and the knowledge that he and his friends and at least one brother (hi!) have read, and could continue to read whatever I might write here, freaked me out. But over the months, the thought of him annoying me to the point of bitching about it for all of those people to see has fallen away for a couple of reasons. The first (and best) reason being that he is completely unannoying. It's a word. I said so. The other reason is the silliness of that. I don't censor myself in my real life very much. Why would I avoid talking about someone who is a daily (albeit from many miles away) part of my life? Well, the answer is simple. I wouldn't. I might even give him his own category. So there.

So, August starts out with the goodness of going to see the aforementioned unannoying man for a long weekend. There will be a first-time meeting with his father, as well as a trip to his hometown, complete with longtime friends. It's a good thing I'm so charming, huh? I don't actually have any feelings of trepidation over any of that. It turns out that I've learned an important piece of information through all of the people I've met in his life so far. Single ladies, pay attention. This might be the best clue to potential men in your life.

A good man will surround himself with people who display all of the same qualities you like in him.

Not to say that they will all be exactly alike, of course. Just that they will, as a whole, be kind/funny/etc. in some combination if that is what he is. Seems like a simple concept, right? But think about it. How many men have you met who have the obnoxious best friend(s)? At first, you write it off as a boy thing that you don't really get. Then, without fail, that guy you thought was great in the beginning turns out to be a lot more like his jackass buddy than you suspected. It's a clue, I'm telling you. That stupid expression about "birds of a feather" flocking together seems to be true. Can someone tell me why it took me so long to learn this particular lesson? Being stubborn rules.

Anyway, I expect that the weekend's activities will be fun for all. And there will be boats. And a "beach" that is not on an ocean, which is a concept I don't even really get. The jury is out on whether it actually qualifies as a beach.


kerrianne said...

I dig the flowers myself. And the green. Big fan of the green.

Betty Underground said...

Yourr post just gave me a cavity. Perhaps a Wheezy post would help.

BG said...

Please. It is a perfectly good beach in a perfectly good summer resort town. Look! People! Sand! Volleyball! Waves! What more could you want (except for maybe the mustachioed man behind the volleyball guy to cross his legs)?

(By the way, here's what the lighthouse pier looks like after a massive winter storm.)

elp said...

Your man is indeed annoying. Why? Because you write about him so fucking much! This is like the online version of goo-goo eyes. Blech!

Wheezy said...

Yeah, your guy sucks!

More flowers and less guys!

I want baby pictures and yoga reports immediately or I won't be coming back!



Jeff Cutler said...

OK. I'm starting to get annoyed too. This site has become "Invasion of the Bitty Snatchers" and we want our Bitty back.

What do we have to do? Blow up the pods with miniature M-80s? Put bad fertilizer in the soil so Bitty can escape from the curse of blah, blah, blahing us to death with stories of Wheezy?

Or do we just yearn for a tiny change of pace?

I suggest it's the latter. Here's what to do...

Post a photo of a baby rife for twisting.

Give us a tale of how a gay friend got it on in the alley behind a gay bar with another gay friend. In a twist that will capture our eyeballs and imaginations, make them gay women. Ooooh, la la.

Tell us a tale about a client who asked you to create the Monna Lisa out of metal. YES, Monna Lisa is spelled with two N's...at least if you read all the signs at the Louvre (I should know, on my blog - http://www.bowlofcheese.com or if you prefer the authentic French - http://www.boldefromage.com I tell tales of my recent trip to Paris).

Or just breathe a little and be funny without obsessing over your relationship. Things seem to be going fine and those of us who are living vicariously through your bliss don't want just one dimension.

Guy Notes.
Gay Boats.
Twisting Babies.
Tristed Metal.
Random Thoughts.
Raunchy Twats.

That's all.


sitboaf said...

a "beach" that is not on an ocean

Ummm... it's called a lake. there's a few hundred thousand of them on the earth. The one you're going to is so big, it's pretty much an ocean anyway. Except it's not salty. Or cold.