So, it's official. I'm going to be a yoga instructor. I've waited to write anything about it, because nothing was set in stone quite yet, and I'm maybe just a tad bit superstitious. The owner of the yoga studio I've practiced at for a long time, has offered to send me to get certified because he wants me to teach there. Teacher training starts on Sunday. I'm equal parts totally pumped and freaked out about what I've gotten myself into. What, might you ask, could you have to fear from yoga training? First, I give you this. I'm sensing I might be in training with people who are a little more into this than just wanting to keep their bodies hot and limber. I mean, I'm all for the basic ideas of the yogi...respect for those around you, compassion, humility, etc...but I don't know how necessary it is that I own a piece of cloth specifically to drape over myself to meditate.

Also, there's the fact that training starts at approximately so-fucking-early-I-might-die o'clock, and goes until 9:00pm. Have I mentioned that I'm not a morning person? Let me clarify. I do not like, enjoy, or really see the need for mornings before 10am. During this training, I will have already been up for HOURS by then. Ewww.

Now, for the good parts. The flexibility to do a job that I'm actually really passionate about, in addition to the art thing. I can teach pretty much anywhere in the world. I can teach a bunch of classes on one day, work in my studio making art all day the next, etc. I make my own schedule completely...eventually, and that is pretty badass. Also, I get to go to work in clothes that are as comfy as pajamas, take classes from all sorts of amazing yoga teachers, and reach enlightenment in record time. Ok, that last part might not be true, but I'll definitely have less stress than doing a job that sucks. It will also keep me all bendy and in shape, and quite frankly, I'm shallow enough for that to be an important motivator. I like the fact that I've been the same size since high school. I intend to keep it that way.

The reaction people have had around me has been outstandingly supportive. Most have wondered what's taken me so long to finally do it, since I've been practicing yoga for over 10 years. More importantly, people have been as excited for me as I am, and that's so very nice. I've had volunteers from people, both in my yoga studio, and people who've never done yoga before, to be my first guinea pig yoga students. Perhaps I'll even get my man into some awesome contortions (I mean, besides in the obvious ways, you perverts).

Namastè, bitches*

*I really wish they would make more of those videos. Hilarious.


Jeff Cutler said...

1. I really thought this was a post from Wheezy until I got to the comment about the studio.

2. You should actually be the hot chick in the front row FACING the teacher so the rest of us can drool at you in semi-safe obscurity.

3. Yoga wasn't even around 10 years ago.

4. A better use of your time is breaking into houses and taking photos for or even writing reviews for you choose.

5. I didn't leave any comments to your last post because it took me three days to stop puking. Putting that horrible lump of a baby on top of that other legacy version of a horrible baby (now the twisted toddler) was too much for some of us to bear. Please stop the insanity before I call the FCC.

6. Where are the fun posts about gay guys carving pumpkins and using the seeds in dirty ways? Or the really cool stories about arc welding or heavy metal?

7. Maybe you could even do a top 8 list like this one.

8. Today's Head of the Charles in Boston and tomorrow is SausageFest 2007 at my humble dwelling - I've invited Sitboaf and I'll chronicle the event at - AND NO, it's not THAT type of SausageFest. We're actually taking all manner of sausage...even pig...and doing a tasting all afternoon. These sausages will be filled with veal and cow and duck and italians (I think that's what they put in Italian sausage) and yes, piglets.


Bend baby, bend (not the twisting, the yoga)